He hasn’t had exactly long to learn his lines. The newspapers found out last Tuesday that the government was planning on delaying England’s so-called Freedom Day until July 19th. It’s been in the news since then, and is a pretty well rehearsed script.

Shame, then, that no one bothered to tell Boris Johnson. He’s only the Prime Minister, after all. Whilst doing the press conference this evening in Downing Street, he managed to mangle his words twice – and both times, he failed to even notice.

The first time was he managed to get the “unlocking” date wrong – having initially quoted July 19th, he then had every journalist watching scratching their heads when he suddenly referred to July 29th. Naturally, no correction of any kind was made. He didn’t even seem to be aware he’d made a mistake.

And moments later, he managed to refer to “the country” as a “company”. Once again, no correction – and also, it was completely unclear whether, by “the country”, he meant England or the United Kingdom. Why do politicians find it so difficult to distinguish between the two?

Even by Johnson’s bumbling standards, this was quite a low. Now, how long do we have to wait until the Night Time Industries Association spout some utterly ridiculous statistics which they’ve got no evidence to back u…

Oh. It’s already happened. This should be a fun week…

By The Editor

Editor-in-chief at Amateur’s House.