Ahoy there! I hear o’ curious goings on right now o’er at Defected. Led by the boss (or shall that be captain?) Simon Dunmore, I gather ye return to work in thar fancy offices – they be in Shoreditch, over in ye east of London – haven’t gone as well as ye captain first hoped!

As ye may already know, ye plague has been around for some time now and all ye pirates have been landlubbered and hiding at home with ye buried treasure. But now ye olde plague is less of a problem, thanks to ye vaccines, Captain Dunmore let it be said to his shipmates “Ahoy there, back on the ship we all go!”.

But this olde pirate kept hearing that all was not well. Ye source whispered into me ear – not everyone be happy with Captain Dunmore’s plan! I thought it be nonsense, until me eye saw this…

Could there be something in it? Just a few weeks ago, Captain Dunmore proclaimeth loudly on Twitter that he was excited to get back on ye ship – but it seems the captain didn’t realise the landlubbers didn’t all feel ye same way as him.

Sources at ye ship Defected be good at holding ye tongues, so I can’t say what’s behind ye rebellion against Captain Dunmore – the label be the best at stopping leaks to ye mischievous scribe. And those that be found guilty by Captain Dunmore? They be made to walk the plank…