Which DJ just can’t stop farting? No, I never expected to write this one either – but it appears the male in question developed something of a problem during lockdown – he started letting out large numbers of increasingly noxious farts.

This wasn’t much of an issue during lockdown, as there’s typically no one around to sniff out the aroma during a live stream – although the odd instance did occur where the sound could be picked up by his microphone. But as gigs have returned, this is becoming more and more of a problem.

Word is that he recently cleared out the entire back stage area of a gig after letting one out of his back passage. The deeply unpleasant eggy smell – think of catalytic converters on older cars and you’ll get the idea – had security worried someone had set off a stink bomb. Mercifully, no one sussed the real explanation for the odour…

By The Editor

Editor-in-chief at Amateur’s House.